It's been well over two years since my last post. So much has happened in the ensuing months--a serious health crisis, a global pandemic, too many deaths, and too much political rancor ripping apart people who once were close. (At least, we were close enough to converse and to care for one another whether we agreed or not.) As a wise woman once said of a difficult period in the life of her church, "It was not a happy time." The past twenty-four months have not been a happy time for many of us.
It will soon be three weeks since my retirement from active ministry. I left St. Peter's United Church of Christ at the end of last month and am now seeking a new path for my life. The thirty-nine years since my ordination were blessed. I've had the privilege and joy of serving in five settings of the church in those years. The memories of people--good people in every place--dwell deep in my heart. I remember with great gratitude how it felt to be a pastor and teacher and the many people, both inside and outside the church, who were my mentors and partners in ministry.
Now I am faced with the challenge of finding my way without a robe and stole, without a pulpit, without another Council or committee meeting. Who will I become? What will I do with this phase of my life? It's far too soon to tell. The anxiety to rush to secure myself in the "next thing" is a temptation to be avoided.
In recent days, I've traveled to visit with friends and to rekindle relationships that were shelved because of the demands of ministry--many of which were self-imposed. I am glad for time to reacquaint myself with these friends and connect with them anew. I'm occasionally having coffee conversations with colleagues on Zoom. I'm raking the leaves which descend at different times and are always blowing from neighbor to neighbor, an endless task. I'm preparing for winter, a fallow season of discernment. I'm sitting by the fire in the evenings with a good book and a glass of wine.
Now that I have the time, I will be active again in posting these reflections. Thank you for reading and joining me on the journey. May God bless you . . . and us all . . . as we find our way.
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| At the End of the Day: A scene from my travels to Starkenburg, MO |
